Witness
“Down to earth”
2 people used these words to describe me yesterday. The first, someone I have known for more than a decade and who have seen me through all the drama that was the past 10 years, especially the last 8. The second, just three weeks ago.
God knows (and my BFF knows) that I was a very very very idealistic person hahaha. It took me a very long time, and major heartbreaks to finally remove the rose-tinted glasses off my nose. I still constantly get surprised that some people are just… Rotten.
Or that some people don’t mean what they say.
Or that there are people who would really intentionally hurt others.
Or people who would go to the worst possible explanation there is instead of giving others the benefit of the doubt.
I’m repeatedly embarrassed at my naiveté especially when friends are like “But we all saw this coming from a mile away”. Haha. Sigh.
May I remain down to earth till the end of my days, while still harbouring hope in abundance inshaAllah. And have these solid friends who look out for me when I do a terrible job of looking out for myself.
Maha posted this quote by Glennon Doyle yesterday and I’m going to post it here too:
We think that our job as humans is to avoid pain […] and our job as friends is to fix each other’s pain. Maybe that’s why we all feel like failures so often — because we all have the wrong job description of love. People who are hurting don’t need Avoiders, Protectors, or Fixers. What we need are patient, loving, witnesses. People who sit quietly and hold space for us. People to stand in the helpless vigil of our pain.
I love the idea of witnesses. We all long to be ‘seen’. Not as projections. Not as caricatures. Not as trophies. I know I do. I want to be “just me”. And I’m so thankful for the tiny group of 5–6 friends who do ‘see’ me. As long as I have them, and remember that I do, I won’t have to be anxious about how I’m seen by others inshaAllah.
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